This Turkish delicacy is the takeaway du choix for white Brits in the know: a flavoursome meaty snack best consumed post-midnight after a drink or seven. Lahmacuns are cheap (an average of £1.60), reasonably healthy, and recherché: all things that white Brits seek in a food, even at 4am.
What sets a lahmacun (or ‘lammy’) apart from the common kebab or fried chicken is that, although easily found in the Dalston area, it is not readily available in all fast food shops. This ‘Turkish pizza’ is described by white Brits as “the hidden secret of kebab shops, really authentic” due to its reduced cost and foreign-sounding name. It is also a prime example of white Brits co-opting a traditionally working-class product as a way to boost their own street cred.
If a white Brit wants to impress the kebab shop owner, and all their friends, they will know that lahmacun is pronounced ‘lah-ma-joon’. For the full experience, order it with salad and both chilli and garlic sauce. Thanks to lahmacuns, white Brits are able to show off their obscure London knowhow and knowledge of different cultures, granting them a modicum of dignity even whilst their cheap takeaway food trickles down their chins on the nightbus home.
The vegetarian alternative, of course, is the classic hoummus and falafel wrap. However, seeing as omnivorous white Brits tend to feel bad when eating meat, the small amount of mince in a lahmacun is another point in its favour: enough to give it flavour, but insubstantial enough to lessen the guilt.